So I Applied To Start A NOW Chapter

Posted on May 23 2013 in Feminism

In light of the Boy Scouts, a private organization, being pressured from outside groups to change their organization’s rules, I’ve decided that hey, why not go all the way? Why can’t I be a member of La Raza? NAACP? NOW? In fact, I emailed the President of NOW about starting a chapter here in St. Louis City, seeing that the nearest chapter from my location is two hours away.

As a woman in St. Louis I think it would be invaluable to have a NOW group comprised of those from all walks of life, all sexes, all beliefs, to join the group.

I’ve proposed some unofficial suggestions for chapter meetings.

First meeting: Introductions, workshop on how to make sandwiches.

Second meeting: Introductions, new members, workshop on how to properly fold fitted sheets.

Third meeting: Introductions, welcome new members, possible speaker from the University of Colorado on how to vomit or urinate to ward off would-be rapists. Comparable workshop on how to select a Personal Defense Weapon, handle it, load it, and shoot the hell out of would-be rapists.

Fourth meeting: Introductions, welcoming new members, workshop in sewing giant floppy vagina costumes from felt! What a wonderful craft!

Fifth meeting: How to walk to Target, Walgreens, Walmart (whichever is closest to our location) and buy our damn birth control.

I think joining now would be amazing. I can’t wait to hear back.

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